Psalm
6 echoes out from the depth of David’s struggles, from a soul weary of anguish,
from a body and mind worn out from the burden of despair. He teaches us that in our own struggles we can
and should cry out to God. The truth is that He’s there with us and
there for us.
But the fact that David is drenched in tears, faint with
sorrow, and weak from groaning out also tells us that his struggle is long-lasting. I think our hardest struggles are the ones
that seem to go on and on and on. Those
are the ones that can make us wonder
where God is, to doubt His presence.
We know God hears our prayers…but does he? We know God is always with us…but is he? We know God answers our prayers…but does he? He does.
He is. He does. Although maybe not always in a way we expect or understand.
As I read through my journal I came across an entry from 3
months ago. The day prior we didn’t have
enough money in the bank to make payroll.
This year has been an ongoing financial struggle for Ignite and some months
me personally. Our leadership team had been
praying, trusting, trying, and expecting
God to provide each month…and that month He
didn’t.
So I did. I emptied my account to make payroll and pay a few other bills to give us some breathing
room. But rather than seeing it as a way
God provided for us and praising Him for it, I became angry, fearful and resentful because God seemed nowhere to be
found.
“My soul is in deep
anguish. How long, Lord, how long?” (v6)
And why? When battles rage on and on we tend to ask
why? Or maybe it’s just me. On the one hand we should because if there is
something we need to repent of or resolve in our own lives we need to do
so.
But after that, the
why doesn’t matter. From there we just need to press deeper
into God and trust Him. Trust that
He’s with us. Trust that He cares. Trust that He’s in control. Trust that He’s working and will, in time,
deliver us. And trust that He can and
will redeem whatever was lost in the battle.
What does matter is
who we become through the struggle. Do
we allow God to develop our spiritual maturity – faith, courage, perseverance,
trust, prayer, fasting, etc.? Struggles expose the chinks in our
spiritual armor, those vulnerable places where a weapon can make solid
contact. Struggles raise the heat so
that our impurities can rise to the surface and be drawn out. We come out of them refined, stronger, better protected for the next struggle…because
there will be one.
“My eyes grow weak
with sorrow; they fail because of all my foes.” (v7)
For David, spiritual
blindness was setting in, which was the case for me as well. His cries to God turned to reasoning with God. If you let me die, who’s going to praise
you? Wouldn’t you prefer praise? I tried
to reason with God as well. It doesn’t
really work.
Then somewhere in between verse 7 and 8 David rallies. He realizes
how weak he sounds. He remembers God’s faithfulness. He reminds
himself that God has heard his cries and is fighting on his behalf. David
ends full of faith, convinced that he will be delivered and his enemies
taken down.
My journal entry ended
with “Lord, help me to rally like David did.”
And He did. God is always with us.
