The Lord has really been speaking to me about judgment, forgiveness and the condition of my own heart. Personality-wise I tend to be sensitive, observant, and a deep thinker; yet I do not show or share my emotions very easily. One result is that I tend to shrug off conflict, not out of discomfort or fear, rather because I consider being strong and “getting over it” as a virtue; especially as a leader.
Over the past several months, I’ve been “blessed” with a few occasions where I was judged falsely. Once that was annoying, once that was embarrassing and mildly painful, and once that down-right hurt. It’s as if the Lord is turning the heat on so that I look inward, truly forgive and heal (rather than shrugging it off), and ensure my own heart produces fruit that honors Him.
The theme for our recent Enrich conference was Forgiveness and Healing Hurts, and our guest speaker was Leon De Haan, president of Thrive Ministries International. His passion is for teaching and equipping Christian leaders, and it was such a blessing to have him with us!
As leaders, we’re in visible positions vulnerable to evaluation, criticism and judgment. Hopefully we’re surrounded by team members who are brothers and sisters in Christ, passionate about the vision, highly motivated and extremely competent. But along with these admirable qualities also comes the risk for stepped-on toes and stepped-on hearts.
As leaders, we’re also in the challenging position of having to evaluate others – monitoring results, holding people accountable, mentoring and coaching. So it’s critical that we a) recognize and deal with our own hurts, such as when we are judged, and b) not judge others in our efforts to “help”.
There is a difference between judging a person, and inspecting the condition of their fruit.
Judgment says we know why they did what they did; that we know the condition of their hearts. We may think that we do – we may even guess right – but the truth is that we don’t, and it’s not for us to decide (1 Cor 2:11). Judging keeps us remembering the offense, reopening the wound, and justifying our own actions or positions in our minds. This is exactly what Satan wants because it keeps us from forgiving, and from being released from the hurt, anger, bitterness, etc. It also brings judgment down on us (Matt 7:1-3).
As leaders we need to admit to God when we feel hurt, to trust Him as our Lord and Savior and also the keeper of our hearts. We need to receive his forgiveness and truly understand what it means. We need to stop judging others. And we need to exemplify forgiveness.
Our decisions, actions and words flow from our hearts (Matt 12:34-35). So our hearts must be healthy and whole in order to lead, preach, counsel, or serve effectively.
…this is what the Lord has been speaking to my heart…
